I'm smassy and I know it

It was a dark and stormy night...that is how we have historically started so many of our wild and crazy stories that I believe date back to 1990. God, we need to get those all together and published here for posterity. We were incredibly brilliant and funny back then weren't we? Such crazy adventures we went on, and with such handsome and manly men with good, strong Hollywood names. Taylor and Grant. Always rescuing, and always perfect. Sigh...

Anyway, today, we start an adventure, my dearest friend and I. To feed our souls, our brains, and our hunger for laughter when the real world can be hard to face. Today, where everyone and their dog has a blog, let us create a place where we can just vent and giggle - if anyone wants to snort or snark along, they are welcome...if not, that's fine too. I love our conversations, and nothing will make me happier than to just share this space with you.

What topic shall we pontificate about first? We are truly smart...wise? Smartassy? Smassy? I think I like smassy. We will go with it. I want to know about what your Smassy self thinks. I will start slow, and as we feel our way through this adventure, perhaps we will adjust ourselves accordingly. Or maybe not. Who knows.

It is January (almost February, crap!) and everyone is "new you!"-ing me to death...what do you think of all this resolution/better you/I can show you how stuff that goes on the entire month of January on TV? Is it too much to ask for any good talk show to veer from the familiar "eat all this yummy crap" December and "let's get in shape!" January? I hate TV. Now don't get me wrong...I fantasize plenty about how this year will be different and I will lose 30 pounds between now and Summer. I do want to be healthy and am considering making changes accordingly, but does it have to be in my face 24/7 all judgey and pretentiously presented by mostly stick-figures for hosts? Are there ANY young(ish), hip, female talkshow hosts that aren't stick thin? I don't think so. And they are telling me all puppy eyed how I need to "do it for your kids." I hate them and just want them to SIT DOWN and SHUT IT. Next month it will be all Valentines all the time. Chocolate specials and blah blah blah. "How to make your valentine a fabulous six course meal for $10!" or "Love yourself this Valentine's Day! You don't need a man to make you happy!" or "Try this one recipe and he'll propose..." I will say it again. I hate TV. And all the soap operas are gone, so I have nothing else but my DVR and some Real Housewives to roll my eyes at -- happily.

I'm not saying I have an answer to TV programming, that would be too productive. What I'm saying is that I just want to be irritated and hear you're irritated too. Are you with me? Do you hate my topic? Do you have a better one?

I'm gonna go and try to find some photos to try and make this page better looking. Please, carry on...Kirsten